Marathon

Michael On July 8, 2001, the racing newsletter reporter ran the San Francisco Marathon. It was so incredibly tough that probably none of you softies can even imagine it. Let those who have ears to hear, listen: Anyone who even thinks about giving up will do so by kilometer 35 at the latest. The only way to complete the 42 kilometers is to firmly believe that there are only two ways to finish a marathon: crossing the finish line on your feet or lying on a stretcher.

For three long months leading up to the event, I had been preparing for the run according to the training program in the book The Non-Runner's Marathon Trainer, starting with 5 km runs, four times a week, and a long run each weekend. The workload increases each week. By the way, you never run the full marathon distance in training—the longest training run is 29 km, three weeks before the actual marathon. But the most important part isn't the physical preparation—of course, your muscles need to be strengthened and your body needs to learn how to manage energy carefully. You have to learn to drink regularly and supply your body with carbohydrates through brightly colored sugar water called "Gatorade."

But most important is the mental preparation. You learn to play movies in your head for the moments when it gets hard to keep going. For example, you imagine yourself running past cheering spectators, passing the the finish line. Or that you're a steam engine that no one can stop. It's also very important not to set a time limit. The goal is to finish the marathon—whether in 3, 4, 5, or even 6 hours, it doesn’t matter at all. The spectators at the actual event were phenomenal, too. It was wild how many complete strangers were cheering me on: "Way to go! You're all winners! Looking strong!"

TODO

By the way, each runner receives a small computer chip that is attached to their shoe. It sends signals to the measurement stations that you pass by. This allows the marathon organizer not only to see exactly how long it actually took you from the starting line (which you may only cross a few minutes after the starting gun due to the many runners) to the finish line, but also to verify that you actually passed all the measurement stations along the route.

The first 32 kilometers go by quite easily; although there are some nasty hills in the way in San Francisco, it's manageable. However, from kilometer 32 onwards, it becomes extremely tough. The muscles threaten to cramp, the knees ache from the pounding of feet against the asphalt, even the arm muscles hurt and need to be shaken out regularly. This is the point where many people give up--either because they set a time limit that is now impossible to achieve or because it seems pointless to struggle through the last stage just to cover a few more kilometers. One might think that if you can run 32 kilometers, you can also manage the last 10, but that's misleading. Experienced runners know: A marathon is divided into two stages: the first 32 kilometers and the last 10 kilometers, both of which should not be underestimated. Of course, your honorable newsletter reporter couldn't give up for at least two reasons: Firstly, he didn't see why he should pay another 50 dollars entry fee for the next marathon, and secondly, he had already told so many people about this run that the shame of giving up would have been immense. The many millions of newsletter readers would surely have laughed themselves silly! And so, the racing newsletter reporter gritted his teeth and galloped through to the finish line. Thank you, dear readers, you saved me!

To celebrate the occasion, I would like to share a quote that I saved especially for this event (I planned ahead). From the internet broadcast of the football match in which the club Bayern Munich recently won the European Cup:

The next day was, of course, terrible. I discovered that you can drive even the shortest distances by car and that many buildings have well-functioning elevators. But the experience was unique. I can only recommend it to everyone--it was simply amazing to limp across the finish line after such an effort, cheered on by thousands of spectators. Then Angelika was right there, I got my medal, we left Golden Gate Park through a side exit, and as if by a miracle, a taxi came by. Out of sheer shock, I gave the driver a five-dollar tip, hobbled up the stairs at home, and slipped into a bathtub of hot water. Only once in a lifetime! To top that, next year I have to walk barefoot through Antarctica.

After the marathon, I realized that all my sneakers were worn out. Adding up all the training runs, they were about 600 km long! Since I already knew which brand and size I wanted, I thought I'd try something new: ordering sneakers online. I clicked around a few times on www.eastbay.com, paid with a credit card, and a few days later, a shoebox was delivered to AOL at the office, where I had them sent. Super cheap! Super fast! Super reliable! A few days later, caught up in the shopping frenzy, I placed two more orders.

Cute little animals

You don't need to go to the zoo to see seals. Right in the middle of San Francisco, they swim to Fisherman's Wharf and sunbathe on some wooden decks. Down at Big Sur, right by the "Highway 1," there's a beach where the somewhat larger elephant seals bask in the sun--and you can get really close to them. No kidding, there were at least a few hundred lying there. They do smell a bit fishy and grunt indecently, but people are thrilled.

Sweets

In illustration 8, you can see the snacks that your uncle buys in bulk at the supermarket, occasionally nibbles on at work, and offers to his colleagues at cost price. Whoever takes a bar just leaves some money in the gum box so that I can buy another bulk pack next time.

What is this in detail? From left to right in image 9: "Nutter Butter" are small cookies, most comparable to "Spekulatius." Taste rating: 2. The blue "Oreo's" package contains black round sandwich cookies with white filling--not really my thing, but when I recently left a large pack from the supermarket unattended at home, Angelika tore it open and greedily devoured a bag before I could intervene. Rating: 3. Second row from the left: the "Clif Bar." A "healthy" bar (with important vitamins and nutrients and such) from Berkeley! Rating: 1, it's really super strong, I eat it often. By the way, it costs $1.75 in the store, which is a real moon price for American bars. At Costco, you can get it for $1 in the large pack. Next: "Reese's"--small chocolate cups with peanut butter filling. When I first encountered this treat in America, it always seemed slightly perverse to me. Slightly salty peanut butter in sweet chocolate? Call me crazy, but I've gotten so used to it by now that I have to give it a rating of 1. Next: "Hershey's" chocolate bar. Americans can't make chocolate, I would trade 10 pallets of "Hershey's" for just one bar of Milka. Sigh! Rating: 4. "Chips Ahoy": so-called cookies (in German Plätzchen or Swabian Loibla) with chocolate chips. Not bad, rating: 3. Last row from the left: "Reese Sticks," like the "Reese's" above, also peanut-based, but more with the consistency of peanut flips, pressed into Twix-like chocolate bars. Quite good, rating: 2. Next: "Luna," the fitness bar for women. No kidding, it says so on the packaging. Initially, I had concerns about unwanted side effects and such, but now I occasionally snack on one when no one's looking. Rating: 2. And finally, at the bottom right in image 9: "Fig Newtons," fig paste in wafer dough, very tasty, rating: 2 plus.

That was the children's supplement "Rundi". Until next time! 'Night, you rascals! Quick, quick, brush your teeth, off to bed, it's already late! Back to the brutal world of adults.

Japanese Class

That's why one learns in two stages: Practical phrases are learned acoustically and written down in a "romanized" script, meaning with Western letters that roughly represent the pronunciation. For example, "Hajimemashite. AOL no Schilli desu. Dozo yoroshiku onegai itashi masu." translates to German as "Hello, how are you? My name is Schilli and I work for AOL. Very pleased to meet you." It is spoken as "Haschieme-maschte. AOL no Schilli dess. Dooso yoroschko onegai-itashimass.

The writing system is divided into three sections: Kanji, the Chinese (!) characters that represent things or concepts. Then there are Katakana characters, which the Japanese use to phonetically spell out foreign words. Naturally, there is no Kanji character for "computer" because it didn't exist a few thousand years ago when Kanji was developed. So, the Japanese say something that sounds similar ("Co-n-pyu-ta") and piece together a few Katakana characters for it. The third script is Hiragana, a type of phonetic script used to attach grammatical endings to words or to phonetically spell out words. For example, there is a Hiragana character for "Ka" or "Gu." Some Japanese children's books are written entirely in Hiragana. Train stations in Japan are, by the way, labeled in both Kanji and (below) in Hiragana.

The three scripts are mixed together colorfully. For example, the sentence "Please take me to the American embassy" is written using all three: For "embassy," there are three Kanji characters that are placed together to mean "embassy." "American" is, of course, not a Japanese word, so it is phonetically spelled out in Katakana ("A-me-ri-ka"). The rest is grammar ("ma-de" for "to" and "onegai shimasu" for "please") and consists of Kanji and Hiragana.

We are learning Hiragana so that we can just read like children. But believe us, that's already hard enough (Figure 10).

The record of the month

Michael And here's something new: The newsletter music reporter is introducing a new super-strong CD from American fields, which he is currently listening to day and night. Today: The band "Cake," which hails from the Californian capital Sacramento, has released a new album called "Comfort Eagle," whose cover you can see in illustration 12. On the internet, you can find the super funny... The translation toEnglish is: "Video for the song 'Short Skirt/Long Jacket'. The translation to English is: "listen -- in the end, a German tourist even appears there! An amazing record! Buy it immediately!

Autounfall

A nightmare to get into an accident in America! Fortunately, the other driver was insured (not a given in America, even though it's legally required), and I was faced with the question of whether to call the police or not. Since the other driver seemed quite reasonable, I just copied his address from his driver's license and took down his insurance details. Rumor has it that in America, you only call the police if there are injuries or if the other person is being difficult. The following Monday, I called our insurance company, and since we only have liability insurance and not comprehensive coverage, our agent advised me to deal with the other person's insurance myself. If both parties have comprehensive insurance, each simply reports the accident to their own insurer, who then battle over the question of fault for years and haggle over every penny. All the acquaintances we told about this were horrified that I didn't have a witness to confirm the incident! We should prepare for years of litigation! I then called the other person's insurance myself and described the incident. After about five rounds of "Buchbinder Wanninger," the agent there finally accepted liability for the accident -- it was pretty clear that the other driver had run a stop sign. As a result, I was granted a rental car and given the address of a repair shop. A week and 2400 dollars later, the sick PERLMAN was released as healed -- the insurance covered the costs. Now the car looks a bit funny since the paint is peeling everywhere except on the new fender and door, but we are glad that everything went so smoothly.

And here is one last announcement before Angelika gets to work: Recently, a German expatriate living in San Francisco informed us about how to get the Friday edition of the Süddeutsche Zeitung, along with our beloved magazine, delivered to your doorstep. The company GLP-News (www.glpnews.com) does this reliably and even below the usual San Francisco retail price of $4.50 per issue! We are happy again and thank the friendly newsletter readers who spoiled us with brought-along SZ magazines during the cucumber season! Clear the way for Angelika!

How does one get the Green Card?

Angelika I want to start today with a report about our still ongoing Green Card process, because in the last few weeks we have once again been struggling through the bureaucratic mills in this regard. Some time ago, I... Rundbrief 05/2000 I have already written about this before, but due to the current occasion and because we keep receiving inquiries, I am happy to summarize it once again.

The coveted document is traditionally called a "Green Card" because it used to be green. It represents the permanent residence and work permit, meaning that American Green Card holders are allowed to take any job anywhere in the USA (or not work at all), choose their American place of residence freely, and live permanently on American soil. Entry and exit to the USA is unrestricted. American citizenship can be applied for after five years of holding the Green Card. However, Green Card holders are not allowed to vote and will lose their Green Card if they give up their American residence. The idea that Green Card holders can live outside the USA and that it is sufficient to vacation in America for a few weeks once a year is a myth. Leaving the USA for more than a year risks losing the American Green Card. Engaging in criminal activities is also not advisable if one wishes to retain their Green Card status.

Additionally, there are already a hundred and one reasons why the American immigration authorities might not grant someone a Green Card in the first place. Those with poor chances include, among others: terrorists, spies, and Nazis, but also prostitutes, drug dealers, polygamists, and convicted criminals of any kind. People infected with HIV, those suffering from tuberculosis, mentally ill individuals (if they pose a threat to the safety of others due to their illness), drug addicts, and foreigners who are likely to become a financial burden on the American state, meaning those who would apply for welfare, generally do not receive the coveted Green Card either. However, there are subtle differences in these cases. For example, a foreign couple would not receive a Green Card if one of them were HIV-infected. On the other hand, if one is married to an American citizen, the Green Card would not be denied in the case of an HIV/AIDS infection.

But who on earth is even allowed to apply for the Green Card? The following groups of people are free to navigate through the bureaucratic jungle:

1. Immediate relatives of American citizens, no quota regulation:

2. Immigration through other relatives ("family-sponsored immigrants"), annual quota:

The possibility of immigration based on the listed family ties initially sounds quite generous. However, in this category, it is subject to numerical annual limitations, meaning it can take years (waiting times of 10 years are not uncommon) before the applicant actually holds the Green Card in their hands. The waiting times also depend on the country of origin. If there is a quota system, no more than 7% of the total amount is allocated to a specific country. Additionally, the total amount issued worldwide annually is not necessarily abundant. For example, 65,000 Green Cards are allocated annually worldwide to siblings of American citizens. This corresponds to the number of siblings in Mexico alone who are waiting for their Green Card.

3. Immigration for employment reasons (Employment-Based Immigrants), annual quota:

In this category "Immigration for Employment Reasons," a so-called "Labor Certificate" is usually required, which is proof that there is indeed no qualified American available for the advertised job. Investors and highly skilled workers, including prominent professors and researchers as well as executives, can consider themselves fortunate because they do not need a "Labor Certificate.

4. Green Card Lottery, annual quota: People from countries with a comparatively low number of immigrants living in the USA. It is a lottery. To participate in the lottery, in addition to the correct country affiliation, you also need to have completed an education. Michael and I, of course, participate every year. And I have to get this off my chest: It seems to have become fashionable in Germany to participate in the Green Card Lottery just for fun, even if one never intends to work and live in America. Yes, dear people, please think of those who have been waiting for years for their Green Card...

5. Political asylum/refugee status, quota regulation for refugees: Political asylum seekers and refugees who are persecuted because of their religion, nationality, ethnic affiliation, etc.

There are also some special cases that allow for a green card application. However, I'll spare you those for now so you don't fall asleep while reading.

And now for the big quiz question: Which category do Michael and I fall into? I've already mentioned that we always participate in the Green Card lottery. So, our only option left is through the employer, namely AOL. By the way, Michael is not considered a highly qualified worker with extraordinary abilities, as this category is reserved for internationally renowned scientists and writers, among others. Even though Michael has already written Perl books, this is not enough for the immigration authorities as proof of fame, much to Michael's chagrin. So, Michael settles for the category "persons with a university degree and special skills." In this whole process, I am considered an "accompanying relative"--which should not be confused with the "immigration through relatives" category. If Michael receives the Green Card with the help of his employer, I will also get it and receive the same privileges--in other words, I will be allowed to work, for example (Michael is already looking forward to this day). The only thing I have to prove is that I am married to Michael. Children under 21 years old are also considered "accompanying relatives." It is important to note that there is no quota regulation for the listed relatives in this case. A truly humane aspect!

The tricky part about the Green Card process with the help of an employer is that, in principle, the employer applies for the Green Card for the foreign employee, as they are providing the job. This can lead to unforeseen problems. If you lose the job, the Green Card application essentially dissolves. The same applies if you change jobs. The ongoing Green Card application ends up in the trash, and you have to start over. Since it currently takes between three and five years in California to even receive the Green Card, you want to avoid at all costs having to go back to the starting line. However, the layoffs currently on the agenda are causing many (including us) to worry about the applied-for Green Card.

However, there is a small glimmer of hope. I already explained in the penultimate newsletter that Clinton, shortly before leaving office, signed the new law "American Competitiveness in the Twenty-first Century Act of 2000." This law states that you are allowed to change your job if you have been in the third and final step of the Green Card process for 180 days and have not yet received a decision. However, a prerequisite for transferring the Green Card application to the new employer is that the new job is similar to the old one. And here we face the next problems, because the law is quite vaguely formulated, and no one currently knows how the immigration authorities will interpret "similar," for example. Everyone is eagerly waiting for the immigration authorities to come out with regulations that describe how the law should be implemented in practice. However, this can take months, sometimes even years. The law also only considers the case where the employee changes jobs (it was introduced under rosy economic conditions). But what happens if you are laid off? Does the Green Card application remain valid if you quickly find a new, similar job? And if so, how quickly must this happen? I tried last week to get an answer to this question by surfing the internet for hours, but everyone is clueless, even the lawyers. The current motto is: Don't get laid off and don't change jobs!!!

To obtain a Green Card with the help of one's American employer generally requires successfully completing three steps:

The president is sending us money

Angelika I would like to report on President Bush and his political ambitions. This time, it's about his tax reform, which was passed at the end of May. During the election campaign, Bush liked to boast about freeing Americans from the scourge of high tax payments. I boldly claim that many Americans voted for him for this reason alone. Because when citizens--no matter where in the world--hear the magic word "tax cut," most of them see dollar signs in their eyes, and everything else becomes secondary. Poor public schools--never heard of them. Millions of Americans without health insurance--not a big deal... The main thing is we pay less tax. However, liberal minds criticize the tax reform heavily because it brings the greatest financial benefits to those who are already very well-off. The Democratic Party managed to trim Bush's originally planned reform and also give lower earners and families with children a piece of the pie by increasing the child tax credit. Nevertheless, this remains more of a drop in the bucket.

To avoid boring you to death, I'll quickly summarize the most important changes. Previously, there were the following five income-dependent tax rates ("federal tax"): 15%, 28%, 31%, 36%, and 39.6%. The tax reform immediately lowers the 15% rate to 10%. The top tax rate will be reduced to 35% (by 4.6 percentage points) by the year 2006, and the remaining rates (28%, 31%, 36%) will be gradually reduced by three percentage points each over the same period.

And so that every taxpayer who submitted an income tax return for the year 2000 can immediately feel the impact of the reform, a refund will be sent out this year. Single individuals will receive a one-time payment of $300, and married couples will receive $600. That's why we recently received a friendly letter from the tax office informing us when the $600 would arrive. Now, you shouldn't think that the money will simply be transferred to your account. We've often reported that the American banking system is somewhat behind the times and that transfers, as known in Germany, practically don't exist. So, the tax office sends a check by mail to each eligible person. I find it amusing to imagine thousands of tax officials stuffing checks into envelopes. However, when you think about the costs that this entire operation incurs, it might bring tears to your eyes. The New York Times has also reported extensively in recent days that the once substantial American budget surplus has significantly shrunk. A phenomenon that many critics of the tax reform had predicted.

Typically American, the check is, of course, spent immediately. The hardware store "Home Depot" (comparable to "OBI" in Germany) is currently running TV commercials announcing that you don't even have to take the tax refund check to the bank, but can redeem it directly at all "Home Depot" locations when purchasing various goods. There are also reports of the first fraudsters who, for example, send official-looking letters that impose completely fabricated processing fees on the tax refund.

Help with spending money

A few weeks ago, a media company agreed to design the advertisement for free (which is called "pro bono" here). At the end of July, I opened the "Bay Guardian" and on page 41, a piece of my photographic ambitions beamed back at me. The "Bay Guardian" is a free weekly local newspaper that is very popular in San Francisco because it not only reports on events, restaurants, etc., but also critically examines the things happening in the city. The issue in which my photo appeared was titled "Best of the Bay" and is particularly sought after. Once a year, the "Bay Guardian" publishes a list of the best and most popular restaurants, cafes, parks, destinations, beaches, cinemas, and so on. Both the readers and the staff of the Bay Guardian have their say. The following week, I admired my photo along with the advertisement in the "San Francisco Business Times." This newspaper also appears weekly and can be found at various newspaper stands in San Francisco. In illustration 18, you can see the advertisement, and it is also available on the official webpage of the umbrella organization (www.compass-s.f.org). At the very bottom left in the fine print, you can also find my name. Yes, yes, I admit that you almost need a magnifying glass to read it. However, in the printed advertisement, it is easier to decipher.

Energy Crisis