Nitpicking and pessimism

Angelika To return once more to the topic of complaining, the nagging and pessimism: Americans might be the other extreme, being the eternal, almost unrealistic optimist. They firmly believe that you can achieve anything if you just want it enough. The dream of "dishwasher to millionaire" is still alive here. Even the homeless person on the street or the black person living in the worst part of the city, where gang wars, violence, and drugs are daily occurrance, still adhere to this philosophy. Considering the fact that many black people will never leave the ghetto and don't even have a high school diploma, this is quite a bitter irony. In my opinion, this attitude also leads to the belief that everyone thinks they can make it on their own, and Americans don't like it when certain things are regulated by the government (e.g., introducing mandatory health insurance).

Just one more thing I would like to mention regarding my visit to Germany. In one aspect, Americans are really miles ahead of us, namely in their friendliness. I am mainly referring to interpersonal interactions in the service industry, but also to everyday interactions with one another. Admittedly, it might have been a bit of a culture shock to fly into Munich, where, as is well known, things are cordial but also a bit Bavarianly rough.

So let me quickly delight you with an experience from "the cosmopolitan city with a heart" as Munich is being advertised as. During my visit to Domus, my previous employer there, I was asked to buy pretzels and rolls for all the Domus children from a Munich bakery, amounting to about 50 DM. Although the saleswoman handed me the requested pretzels, she simultaneously remarked snappishly that next time I should definitely place such a large order a day in advance, after all, she now had hardly any goods left for her customers, which wasn't true because I was in a bakery that constantly bakes new rolls and pretzels, but never mind. Such a thing would never happen to you in America. Here, they would be more grateful that I spent so much money in one store, and even if I had only bought something for 50 cents and it was the last roll on the shelf, they would have gladly sold it to me. In Germany, on the other hand, I often had the feeling that as a customer, you can be glad if you get anything at all. Here, you can really ask the salesperson a million questions and try on 10 pairs of shoes without buying anything, or return the jeans you bought on the next day without any explanation, and you will still be greeted with a smile, and the smile is usually not fake or forced.

At the restaurant, at the hairdresser's, in the supermarket -- everywhere you encounter the same friendliness. However, many believe that Americans in the service industry are only friendly because they rely on tips or sales commissions. There may be some truth to that, but I now tend to think that it’s more a matter of attitude. Here, you get the feeling that they enjoy selling and don't see the customer as a necessary evil. And even if the friendliness is just because of the tips, I still prefer that over being served by a grumpy person.

There is, by the way, a place in America where one desperately searches for friendliness, just as one does here, namely at government offices. However, this seems to be a worldwide phenomenon.

Before I close, let me add why I believe that everyday interactions are also friendlier here. In my opinion, this is because Americans are extremely talkative and have mastered the art of small talk. Whether going up in an elevator, waiting for the bus, or standing in line at the post office, Americans will casually direct a few friendly words even to complete strangers. Admittedly, these conversations are often about trivial topics like the weather, but I have also experienced a woman on the street calling out to me that I was wearing an especially cheerful T-shirt today, or a cashier admiring my earrings. Regardless of whether these comments are sincere or not, they somehow make you feel great.