09/08/2019   English German
  Edition # 130  
San Francisco, 09-08-2019

Key Duplication Machine
Figure [1]: The machine takes the old key and carves a new one.

Michael Recently, while visiting the grocery chain Trader Joe's, I remembered that I also wanted to get a duplicate of our apartment key made, and a sign in front of the adjacent store "Bed, Bath, and Beyond" indicated that this service was offered inside. I expected to find a cobbler in a small booth near the exit behind the registers who also offered key services, but instead, I saw -- a machine.

An old lady was just standing in front of it, the machine was humming busily and spat out a newly cut key into the output slot. She took it, exclaimed "nifty!" and toddled off. So I read the instructions on the touchscreen and followed the prompts to insert the key to be copied into a keyhole-like slot on the front of the machine, select the type of key (door key or car key), and pay the required $7.49 plus tax by credit card. Until now, I thought making a duplicate key only cost a few dollars, but apparently, the price for this service, like everything else here in the Bay Area (despite the government claiming barely noticeable inflation!), has tripled over the last 20 years. Oh well!

My email address was also requested by the machine, and it promised not to store my credit card information, otherwise a villain might find out which address the key fits into the lock. It also asked if I wanted to leave my fingerprint so it could store the key under it (what?), but I politely declined. The machine then started to rattle dangerously inside, and after about a minute, a newly carved golden door key fell into the output tray. I removed the old key and simply left the store with the duplicate, as the receipt was sent to me via email. The key was a bit sharp-edged, but it fit perfectly into the lock at home. Incredible, what these whippersnappers come up with these days! Such a machine would probably do well in Germany with its immense labor costs. However, Germans prefer significantly more complicated locks than Americans, who favor cheap good-enough solutions. But who knows, maybe something like this already exists over there!

RSS Feed
Mailing Liste
Impressum
Mike Schilli Monologues

Get announcements for new editions

New editions of this publication appear in somewhat random intervals. To receive a brief note when they're available in your mailbox (about once every two months on average), you can register your email on the 'usarundbrief' Google Groups list.

Your email address
All Editions:

 

Send us a comment
We'd like to hear from you, please send us feedback if you want to comment on the content or have suggestions for future topics.

Simply write your your message into the text box below. If you'd like a response from us, please also leave your email. If you want to stay anonymous, simply put 'anonymous' into the email field. This way we'll get the message, but we have no way to respond to you.

Your email address

Message
 
Contact the authors
Latest update: 10-Sep-2024